I emigrated from India to the United States when I was 11. My upbringing seemed to focus more on the practice of religion, rather than spirituality. In my mind, there was always a separation between God and the rest of us. However, there is a major benefit in being East Indian and brought up in a religious environment. From a very early age we spent a lot of time in pujas, our daily religious ritual of prayers, chanting, and the recitation of mantras. Included in this is chanting of the Gayatri Mantra to Divine Mother. This alone takes over an hour.

In 1993 I had an injury on my foot and was home for about 3 weeks on crutches. I began to read a book that my father-in-law gave to my husband and me called "Daddy, Am I a Hindu?" by Ed Viswanathan. The book was an overview of Hinduism and sparked a deep interest within me which awakened me to learn much more about Hinduism. I asked family members what they understood of this and other books, but still I was not satisfied. My desire to understand spiritual matters only increased even more.

However, I had an inherent fear consciousness from the age of a young child. It has taken many years for me to drop my fears and to overcome negativity in my thinking. I have had to really work on developing faith. These fears stem from the fact that I was always a very unhappy and negative person. Still, from an early age, I was intent on searching for an avenue of freedom from these afflictions. My brother-in-law was a very serious spiritual student and had found his Guru in India. I often queried him and he would counsel me to find a Guru to free myself. Since I could not run off to India, I was eager to find out if it was possible to find a guru in America. He replied that you don't need to find a Guru, He finds you. He also cautioned me against "so-called" gurus who can lead you astray, warning that the world is full of fakes, while true Gurus are few and far between.

My reaction to this was that this was just another negative aspect of the spiritual path. I was very frustrated. And his statement that a true Guru finds you just added to the confusion; since I was here in America, how would I ever find a true Guru, or one find me, especially if they are all in India. Even so, all the searching had indeed brought me to a certain point where I felt that finally I was really ready for a Guru.

My uncle gave me the book, "I Am That" by Swami Muktananda of Siddha Ashram. In this book the author's teaching focused on Self-Realization as seeing a tiny, sesame-seed-sized, blue light in the third eye center. But as I was interiorizing, I felt as if I was going to get lost in this light and go to an unfamiliar place and not be able to return. With the feelings of crippling fear I had all of my life, I felt that I might be lost forever in this place of blue light. I was not properly prepared to delve into higher teachings.

From this experience and from many other life experiences in general, I couldn't seem to overcome the crippling fear in my life. It turned into an emotional issue, and at times I felt as if I was going crazy. Then my uncle gave me Autobiography of a Yogi. It was a very old, well-read copy, and had a missing chapter. My uncle had received it from his wife's uncle. None of these people had been members of Self-Realization Fellowship. It's also interesting that my husband began to read it and as he did so he became more and more excited. He would say, "Look at this!" and would show me this and that in the book. Then one day he stopped cold and said, "Wait a minute!" He kept files in our basement of various spiritual teachings he had collected over the years. He ran down the stairs and there it was - a file with information about Yogananda and Self-Realization Fellowship, as well as the application to study the SRF Lessons. This application he had sent for and received over 10 years earlier, but had never sent it in!

My husband wanted us to apply for the Lessons, but I balked and said no. In India it is a long tradition that one must seek out a Guru who is incarnate on the planet. It is common in that land to have a Guru who passes on their spiritual wisdom with diksha, an initiation by the Guru into a specific path. But my husband convinced me to try the Lessons as they were only a few dollars. What did we have to lose? After we received them, I read about a dozen of and began to see the pure wisdom of Yogananda's teachings.

The reaction to the SRF Lessons from a couple of my family members was more surprising than not. They had heard that people could go crazy by a steady practice of meditation. Their main concern was that a person could prematurely awaken kundalini, the energy force in the spine. But it wasn't long that both my husband and I were hooked on the Lessons

As my husband and I continued the Lessons, we came to understand Master's statement to his disciples that it did not matter if you came to him while he was in the body, or after. After all, he is omnipresent. Eventually, that satisfied us both, and I was able to understand that I had indeed been "found" by my Guru.

It seems that it was not one singular moment in realizing that Yogananda is my Guru. As we studied the Lessons and began to practice the meditation techniques, I understood better my responsibilities to the Guru and more importantly, the Guru's responsibility to me. This included the "biggie" for me: trust. Even though I still had tremendous fear, my brother-in-law helped me to understand that this underlying fear in my life supplanted my faith in Guruji. He helped me to understand that when faith comes in, fear leaves. I knew that I needed to develop that faith. He showed me by his example and his life that he had no fear because he knew his Guru was looking after him. That was a beautiful thing. And even though he had a Guru in India, he really loved Yogananda's teachings and encouraged us both to pursue it to the end. I have built my faith one step at a time, by reading, by doing the techniques, by following the precepts as outlined by Master, and by attending and serving at our temple.

Learning to behave is very important. What has helped me is to surround myself with all the material Master and SRF has given to us - the books, the CD's, and the Lessons. I am usually listening to one of the talks. I love Sri Daya Ma's talks because she speaks to us on a very practical level. She is my role model. She has a way of making everything sound so simple. She has helped me to understand that change begins with me, that no one can change me but myself. With her help, I really watch my thoughts and my actions, because I understand now that we can only change ourselves. After listening to Master's and Daya Ma's messages many, many times, one finally starts to get it. But I must say that all of this is only possible with the help of our Guru, and with a lot of prayers to Master to help one change.

For me the understanding that I'm a soul, not the body, that I'm eternal, not mortal, that I live on and do not just become nothingness – all of this wisdom helps me to handle the daily challenges of my life. Among my many fears, I've always had a fear of death. These teachings have helped me to actually realize that I am an invincible soul. My whole life has been the crash of the "known" world, because it has been undermined by constant, debilitating fear. Fear likes to lurk around and shake me up. So I always have to reestablish myself. My greatest goal and work this lifetime is to banish fear once and for all.

Through these advanced meditation techniques you get in touch with your true self: you as a soul. That's the only way you can live in this world with peace. Without this realization, there is wrong behavior and thinking. Through this teaching, we do get in touch with our soul and behave rightly. We start doing good works in the world. We begin to see God everywhere. We develop compassion and love for others. All these things are necessary to living in a healthy body and mind. Our misery in this world is caused by the delusion that we are separate from God. When stressful times arrive in our lives, through these teachings we are able to tune in with our underlying unity with God. Then not only is our life better, but we also have a positive impact on the world in general. I talk to God. Daya Ma has taught us to simply say, "I love you, Lord." That is so simple, sweet, and beautiful. I also chant while I'm working or cooking, or performing activities of service to God and Guru. These inner and outer activities keep me in tune with God.

You have to become dependent on meditation, meaning you can't function without it. Develop that kind of mindset.

Your daily sadhana ... you cannot function, you cannot live without it. It is then that you find the time because you can't live without it. These are very important teachings that Master brought to us all. It's not just about meditation. Master's work covers everything a human could possibly want or need in daily life and on a spiritual path.

His writings and talks cover our daily and business lives, personal relationships, the spiritual path, and everything we deal with in our lives.

Also, I love the thought of emerging Kriyabans, those who have been initiated in Kriya Yoga, in the world. As we deepen the power of our thoughts and prayers, we help the world in significant ways. It is true that if all the Kriyabans on Earth send positive thoughts and vibrations out into the world, we help to uplift people in untold ways.

It is my opinion that all of us who participate in the healing techniques cannot even know how wonderfully we are impacting the rest of the world.

Much of the time it is fear and disillusionment that bring people to a spiritual path. I would offer the encouragement that I have personally realized - that this body and life is not all there is.

There is something much greater than we perceive. This path helps people to reconnect with the reality that is God so that we can free ourselves. I would suggest that people try the lessons and the teachings of Master and SRF.

See for yourself if they help you to change your thinking and connect with God in your heart.

Then you can move forward, in life and on the spiritual path. Understanding the Guru's responsibility was huge for me. It was important to me to know I was protected and someone would be looking after me on the spiritual path.

I knew there was not a human being who could save me from all those fears. It had to be an avatar, a Guru, and the Guru is the speaking voice of God. Master has done wonders with me.

I feel that I have conquered fear and negativity once and for all. I think it is important that when one is choosing a Guru, take a look at his disciples to see what they have become.

That will tell you a lot about the Guru! I love this quote of Master's: "To you is given the power that can move the world and alter fate." That realization empowers you to do anything in this world.

Remember, this path is all about Self-Realization, realizing that you have within you everything you need to direct your destiny.